Day Sixty-Seven

So, is this the way it's going to be?

2010-12-17T07:18:00.000-08:00

Another post that's not really a post? Well maybe. But you're busy this time of year, too, right? Following yesterday's post -- and trying to stay with the dentistry theme -- I'll share a little memory from the days back before autism when Oliver just seemed incredibly ahead of the curve. Christmas morning, 2002. Switzerland. Oliver was four months old to the day. And that morning he looked up

I'm just the mother

2010-12-16T19:48:00.000-08:00

This is going to sound like a big complaining post but that isn't the way I intend it. It's less of a complaint and more of an observation that can be generalized to, well, lots of interactions with professionals. You see, I take Oliver to a completely awesome pediatric dentist. Every parent I know who has a kid with autism takes their child to this dentist. The guy has a waiting list for his

For all you homeschoolers

2010-12-15T07:25:00.000-08:00

Today is the Great Christmas Cookie Baking Extravaganza at my house in which I attempt to make four batches of different cookies in just a few short hours. My day began at the grocery store at 7am this morning. .... SO! Looks like another linking kind of blog post day here at DaySixtySeven. This time I'm sharing links aimed at all you homeschoolers. But even if you don't homeschool, I hope

The trouble with posting

2010-12-14T11:05:00.000-08:00

I'm trying to post here more often, get back in the swing of things -- Have you noticed? I'm trying! Trouble is, writing is something I cannot do while multi-tasking. Unfortunately, until cloning becomes an option, or the holiday season comes to an end, it is all about the mult-tasking around here. Is it like that for everyone this time of year? So, in the meantime, forgive me if I just throw a

Five year RDI special package

2010-12-08T07:18:00.000-08:00

Five years ago this week our family started working with an RDI consultant and changed the course of our lives. Taking that initial step has led to many, many surprising and rewarding discoveries for our family. It helped to normalize our everyday life. It helped us connect with Oliver in ways that we hadn't imagined possible. It empowered us by giving us the knowledge and the tools we needed to

Our life in pictures

2010-12-07T11:06:00.000-08:00

Two days ago I loaded Oliver's iPad with all the family photos that I had taken over the years. The boy has spent more time than I imagined looking through them and it has prompted some interesting exchanges between us. It feels like we are on the verge of being able to have a conversation about context and memory. We aren't there yet but it finally feels like a possibility. There used to be a

Learning by cleaning

2010-12-06T07:56:00.000-08:00

So, one of the really great things about RDI is that it has made us very conscious of the many ways that we can involve Sami and Oliver in the everyday, mundane details of life. Over the years, I confess, it hasn't always been fun to involve the kids in the shopping and the cooking and the cleaning and all the other errands that pile up each week. But spending that time together, doing things

Everytime I hear it

2010-12-05T09:48:00.000-08:00

This song lifts me up.

Great expectations

2010-12-04T19:11:00.000-08:00

Before bed tonight, the boys and I were all snuggled down with the iPad, ready to watch chapter 3 of Rockford's Rock Opera (a totally awesome "ecological musical story" about extinction -- how's that for bedtime fare?), when Nik called out to Oliver that it was time to brush his teeth. "No, Thanks." he replied. So I joked: "C'mon, Oliver, tell us how you really feel about it." and he said: "I

i think it's beginning to look a lot like iChristmas!

2010-12-02T08:02:00.000-08:00

As you might know, I've been scheming about how to get the boy an iPad since the summer when I started to read about how much other kids were able to do with this new technology. Oliver has made such great strides this year and I'm thrilled with the learning and growth that he's achieved, but I'm ever on the lookout for ideas that might make that learning easier for him -- and the teaching easier

Who am I to argue?

2010-11-29T19:42:00.000-08:00

"Ok boys, it's just about time." I said this by way of preparing them that bath time was drawing to a close. Sami ignored me. Oliver said: "I. don't. want. to. get. out. I. want. to. stay. in." And just like that he won his first argument.

In which I am thankful for beans and rice and many other things.

2010-11-27T19:30:00.000-08:00

I don't know if I can come up with the right words to describe Thanksgiving, a day that was just all kinds of perfect from beginning to end. To begin with, it started after a full night of sleep -- so really, our nine month track record of sleep gives me more than a person has a right to be thankful for! Then, when the roasted turkey gave our house the smell of Thanksgiving, I packed up the bird

Echoing Oliver

2010-11-21T18:22:00.000-08:00

I wish you could hear Oliver talk. I wish you could hear the way he manages to get it all out, but slowly and only with me asking him and then repeating each and every word as he says it. It is laborious. A process every time. "Oliver," I say as he hands me his plate with half a sandwich still remaining, "is there something you want to say?" "I. don't. want. to. eat. that. I'm. finished." Or,

Creating Meaning: A Life Beyond Reason

2010-11-16T06:41:00.000-08:00

Having a child with a disability has required me to create new categories of meaning for my life. Before Oliver I understood the world, and my place in it, in ways that are -- quite frankly -- unrecognizable to me today. It is a process, this knitting together of new symbols, ideas, daily rituals and beliefs. It is a new becoming. And as Oliver grows, as we grow together, the shift in meaning

New little people

2010-11-13T06:38:00.000-08:00

So many friends are having babies this Fall! Last night brought the news of a much anticipated new little person. I imagined my friend, a newly minted mom, snuggled down to sleep with her baby and I remembered all the wonder of holding my babies for the first time. I hope I never forget the world of promise I felt then.

Found footage: Sami Cam under the sea!

2010-11-11T07:40:00.000-08:00

I was deleting some files from the flip cam last night and found a couple that were new to me. One in particular made me laugh to think that even with our unconventional approach to education, maybe Sami is learning something after all! If you've got a couple of minutes, watch this amazing TED Talk about the wonders of oceanic life. Or, if you don't have five minutes, you can watch Sami's

A bedtime story.

2010-11-06T19:26:00.000-07:00

As the boys are ready to snuggle down into their giant shared bed, with me in the middle, I remind them: "Don't forget to pick out a book for me to read." Oliver and Sami both make their way over to the crammed bookshelf. Oliver looks for 2.3 seconds and chooses an old favorite. Sami takes longer, looking for a book about submarines that I don't remember. The boys finally take their place on

This little light of mine

2010-11-04T19:13:00.000-07:00

When you are a parent of a child with extra needs, or just a parent, when you homeschool, or just deal with the homework after school, it is pretty important to also think about where you fit into the equation. Lots of times I sit down at the end of a particularly sucky day and just shake my head and think: "What was going on with him today?" Then, usually a day or two later I feel my mood

It all began with the bubble wrap

2010-11-03T19:35:00.000-07:00

Remember awhile back when I posted this link to the bubble wrap website? Oliver had taken quite a liking to it and I predicted that soon he would have the mouse/cursor thing figured out. I had, from time to time, tried to get the boy to use the computer but learning how to use the mouse or track pad did not come easily to my boy who really struggles with eye-hand coordination. But I was right

Since you asked: a post about Sami's school.

2010-11-02T09:37:00.000-07:00

So, I've mentioned that Sami is going to a non-traditional, democratic school and it has been quite a learning experience for the both of us! Sami's cohort at the school is a group of seven children between the ages of five and ten. It is a very small school with three activity rooms, two bathrooms and a kitchen, plus a large-ish piece of property that includes a play area, a garden and a giant,

Nothing to see here, folks. Just a little autism mama's blocked brain syndrome.

2010-10-25T19:48:00.000-07:00

I'm back. I think. I have been wanting to write here but the words? They are a-fighting me. They jump around, mashing themselves together then breaking apart again somewhere on the road between my brain and ready fingers. I've tried to just force it a couple of times and my dashboard is littered with thoughts that didn't go anywhere. Is this writer's block? It feels more like autism mama's block

Learning from Donald Triplett

2010-09-18T05:43:00.000-07:00

I wanted to write about what we can learn about autism from the life of Donald Triplett as detailed in the recent article in the Atlantic Magazine. Triplett was the first person ever to be diagnosed with autism, and if you haven't read the article: do! The man defied expectations and, in many ways, probably defines hope for many parents of autistic children today. There is also a wonderful video

Why I can't even put a decent post together

2010-09-14T18:11:00.000-07:00

I cannot tell you how glad I am that garden season is almost over. I am exhausted. I already called it quits for the season. But then for some pathological reason I brought home a half bushel of sweet red peppers and eight pounds of green beans. We WILL have pickled beans and roasted peppers all winter even if my husband is seriously considering an intervention for me over my compulsion to

The plum was very vile on the second day of school

2010-09-08T10:14:00.000-07:00

Sami started school yesterday and had three major meltdowns over the course of the next twelve hours. I'm not used to my kids having meltdowns. Normally both are go-with-the-flow kind of boys. At first I was a little put out: what is wrong with this kid? But being five is hard. Starting a new school, a new routine? It's hard. Learning to negotiate with a whole roomful of new people? Hard, hard,

Why I'm glad my friends are so insightful

2010-09-08T07:01:00.000-07:00

Recently a friend and former teacher came to visit just as I was putting away the homeschool lesson for the day. Oliver and I had been working hard on one-to-one correspondence for a number of weeks and still, he wasn't getting it. I was having a hard time not being frustrated, mindful that I can't teach effectively once I start in with the pessimism: "He's NEVER going to get it!" But still,

Problem-solving in action

2010-08-29T14:27:00.000-07:00

Um, two things about yesterday's post. I probably should have included a teeeny bit of additional information about the searching for the sheets. You see, Oliver is not the great communicator that his brother is. So he didn't exactly say: There's no sheet so I'm gonna find one. Instead, I watched him go first to RT's room, come out empty-handed, then walk down the hall to my room. Curious, I

What goes into a jar of jelly

2010-08-28T20:23:00.000-07:00

September is approaching and I couldn't be happier. Once again, August has kicked my butt. I'm exhausted. My feet hurt from standing in the kitchen for hours and hours. My house is filthy dirty from all the produce that gets lugged in and out on a daily basis. And yet? Yesterday I brought home about 50lbs of grapes (that I got for free!!) that hopefully will soon be made into juice and jelly and

Happy Birthday, my little one.

2010-08-25T19:47:00.000-07:00

It's late and I'm tired but I couldn't let this day go by without telling the world how much I love you, Oliver. So even though you kept me up last night between 2:30 and 6am, I think I'll keep you. But let's not make it a habit again, OK? I have a feeling that eight is going to be an awesome year, we have a lot of adventures ahead of us, and I want to be well rested for it.

It has begun.

2010-08-13T08:16:00.000-07:00

The great tomato carnage of 2010 has begun.

The Tomato Post -- that wasn't. Or, About a boy and his words.

2010-08-12T05:26:00.000-07:00

So, I'll bet you thought this post was going to be about how we to took that gazillion pounds of tomatoes and handily whipped up giant batches of sauce and salsa that will keep us going all winter, right? Um, yeah. Well, instead, it is about how I begin to hyperventilate every time I go near the kitchen and catch a sight of these angry veggies staring back at me: What was I thinking? And there

The pickle post

2010-08-10T20:21:00.000-07:00

It's August. It's hot as hell. And I've got like a hundred million pounds of fruits and vegetables waiting to be put up for the winter. "Put up." Sounds kind of quaint, doesn't it? Well it in no way imparts any kind of useful information about how much work is involved in canning. We didn't do so great with our 100 mile challenge this year. Last year I'd say a good 85% of our food for the

The heart is a muscle -- or reflections from a weekend in NY

2010-08-09T19:45:00.000-07:00

It was five years ago this week when a hole ripped wide in my heart upon hearing the words autism for the first time. Little did I know how useful that hole was going to be or how much I would learn to appreciate it: just another instance of things not being what we expect in autismland. Because, you see, the heart is a muscle -- a sometimes unobliging muscle in my case, prone to arguments with

Missing in the eye of the beholder

2010-08-03T20:09:00.000-07:00

Our neighbor across the back alley had just come home to find that another neighbor's dog had gotten out of the yard. After quickly rounding up the dog and putting him back inside the fence and securely latching the gate, he was surprised to see a bicycle police officer coasting to a stop before him. "Did you find him?" "Yeah," said my neighbor, surprised that the police were aware that the dog

The best grilled cheese sandwich I never ate

2010-07-19T07:50:00.000-07:00

It was only 11:30 in the morning and it already felt like a day when everything went wrong. Maybe it is because the night before had been one when Oliver didn't sleep much at all, breaking his string of nights slept through. If you have lived that life you know how it feels to be without patience, full of over-wrought emotions and unable to muster more than a fraction of optimism. So when I sat

Swimming, biking and the Great Mystery Garden

2010-07-17T02:29:00.000-07:00

Summer is my season. I've said that here before, I know. In fact, I said it in my very last post! Our days have been filled, filled to the brim, with all sorts of good things. Someone gave us one of those large blue pools that are now a ubiquitous part of neighborhood backyard life. Setting the thing up and learning how to keep the water clean was a LOT more work than I anticipated, but it has

Some learning resources

2010-07-07T07:40:00.000-07:00

My house is quiet. I'm home alone in the middle of the day. This never happens. So while I have a few minutes to myself here is a quick and dirty post with a few things that I've been meaning to share. I've discovered a wonderful blogger and if you are a homeschooling mama or just someone who needs a bit of a boost in the creativity department, you should check her out. Teach Mama is such a

Optimistic, thrilled, apprehensive and old all in one post

2010-07-01T19:50:00.000-07:00

Summer is my season. I love these long days, nights with the windows open, crickets singing, fans blowing. I love sticky feeling of sweaty boy skin and feet green from fresh cut grass. All of it. I love all of it. And at this moment in time, this day, this week -- life is just so, so sweet. I know: you could just gag, right? Well, maybe it is the vitamin D talking (or the Newcastle) but summer

Everybody loves frozen treats

2010-06-30T20:04:00.000-07:00

It has been hot, hot, hot in our little corner of Virginia, so the boys and I are spending a lot of time finding ways to keep our cool. I'm blogging today over at (Never) Too Many Cooks and sharing one of our favorite summer treats -- a delicious recipe with ingredients that you probably have in your very own kitchen right this very moment!

Being alone with myself and a few thousand others

2010-06-28T08:04:00.000-07:00

I traveled to the outskirts of Boston this weekend to celebrate the marriage of a dear friend. Although my friend married in November, she and her new husband waited until this past weekend to gather their family and friends together in celebration. My closest friends from graduate school were there and we fell into that easy rhythm that you can create with the people you carry in your heart,

Suddenly Summer

2010-06-25T21:15:00.000-07:00

Today was one of those days when it really felt like summer vacation -- and not just because the calendar says it is the middle of June, but because our attitude says so. We're busy finding our groove and trying to beat the heat. We don't have air-conditioning and with a week of temperatures in the mid-nineties, it has been a challenge to keep myself the kids from being too cranky. Lucky for us,

Summer School

2010-06-24T20:37:00.000-07:00

It strikes me as not one bit odd that we do a lot of things backwards around here. And if you knew me it also might not strike you as odd. So when all my facebook friends are posting that WooHoo! It is the last day of school!!! We are in full swing homeschool mode. You see, December through February really is no time for me to try and teach anybody anything. During those long, cold winter months

I almost forgot. ...

2010-06-08T20:51:00.000-07:00

Today is the 8th of the month and that means that we are one day into our fifth month of sleeping. I sometimes can't get over my good fortune. Last Saturday my boys slept until 9am! And so did the rest of us. And tonight? Oliver said this: Yes, Oliver got a communication device last week. He carries it around with him everywhere -- I think he likes the weight of it. Since he brought it home the

On the Road and Biking with the Boys.

2010-06-06T20:02:00.000-07:00

OK, so: The Vacation. A good friend of ours moved to Georgia for the summer and when she excitedly told us about the adventures in store for her wonderful family, she let it slip that the place where she was going was a golf cart community. Know what that is? Neither did I. Turns out that Peachtree City, GA, was planned and built around a series of golf cart paths that people can -- and do --

Sweet Expansion

2010-06-05T17:02:00.000-07:00

Ugh. I'm so tired right now I could puke. Or maybe I feel that way because I just inhaled three Klondike bars. I tend to go for the high-fat, high-sugar foods when I'm exhausted. But no, no, don't worry. I know what you are thinking and Oliver is still sleeping to the tune of 12 hours last night thank you very much. No, I'm totally wiped out because, oddly enough, I'm lucky enough to have someone

Changing my M.O.

2010-06-04T20:12:00.000-07:00

Seems like my new M.O. is to pop in here every four weeks heralding another sleep-full month and then disappear into the happy slumbering ether. Well, I'm getting a jump on myself this time because it won't be another full month of sleep until the 7th of the month. But if I waited 'till then I'd feel obligated to post again about how incredible, absolutely amazing it feels to well, you know,

Totally Random Biology

2010-05-13T08:39:00.000-07:00

My dear friend S., who is the most knowledgeable person I know about naturalistic parenting, sent me two links this week that I want to share. The first is a link to a study that has me thinking and reminds me how thankful I am for the objectivity of science. The title of the study is: Micronutrients Versus Standard Medication Management in Autism: A Naturalistic Case–Control Study. The second

Back from Blogging Break (I think)

2010-05-11T19:26:00.000-07:00

Tap, tap, tap. ... Is this thing on? Hello? Anyone there? I'm so sorry I'm so late to post. I was due a couple of weeks ago. I had it in my mind every day: Tonight I will blog. Then I curled up in bed with a book instead. But I'm back to this autism cum sleep-celebration-blog with some pretty joyous words: May 7th. Three Months. All night. Every night. So I hope you'll understand my little

A quick post before I slumber

2010-04-16T19:40:00.000-07:00

Oliver continues to sleep. During an appointment at the developmental pediatrician yesterday, she congratulated us twice for whatever it was that we did that finally worked. But I really believe that Oliver is now sleeping despite our best efforts. After years of struggling to honor what it seemed that Oliver needed at night -- to be comforted by human closeness -- while simultaneously managing

The things we do

2010-04-12T07:32:00.000-07:00

See these little discs? Know what they are? Well, let's just say they fall into the category of "Things I never thought I'd be doing as a mother." Last week Oliver chipped a tooth. At first, I was nearly distraught. When he smiled it seemed half his front tooth was missing. And Oliver has a gorgeous smile. I wanted it fixed, like, right away. Could there be a bigger dental emergency?

April is off to a good start

2010-04-02T19:35:00.000-07:00

What a great day! Authentic Mexican tacos for dinner. .... a long bike ride with my guys. ... unexpected outdoor music, then home again where I discovered that I am the featured contributor over at the Gravity Pulls You In site. If you haven't read the book yet, click on over and read all the excerpts from a pretty amazing collection of writing.

Why I'm not blue about autism

2010-04-01T15:40:00.000-07:00

I'm not much of a joiner. I tend to shy away from groups and causes. I was once a girl scout and I joined a book club a few years back but I can't think of many other joiner-type activities that I've been involved in over the years. I did not join the Special Olympics drive to ban the r-word, either. At least not in the sense that I signed the petition. It isn't that I disagree with the concept.

Taking awareness on the road

2010-03-31T07:47:00.000-07:00

On Saturday something happened that made me very, very happy. Saturday was the day for our local autism awareness walk/run and this was the first year for me to participate. The event is sponsored by a local, parent-run organization and the money raised is then given out to families in the area in the form of scholarships, meant to cover needs not funded by some other means. What I hadn't

Sleeping makes me hungry!

2010-03-25T19:20:00.000-07:00

I'm over at (Never) Too Many Cooks today. If you haven't had a chance to check out this food blog, take a moment to click on over. And while you're there, bookmark the site. I'll be posting there every other week or so and I hope to write a bit more there about our continuing efforts to cook locally and with the seasons. Today, though, I'm writing about rice. Rice? Yes, rice! Not the sexiest of

First day of Spring. ....

2010-03-20T19:31:00.000-07:00

. ... and it was glorious!

Sleep is the new coffee

2010-03-18T19:35:00.000-07:00

Want to know how to kick the coffee? Try sleeping. Seriously, I cannot recommend it more highly. I've stopped counting the numbers of nights. I almost take for granted that I'm embarking on a solid night of sleep once my head hits the pillow. Almost. And during the daytime I never wonder anymore if I should skip the mug and just mainline the caffeine. There's still one or two things that amaze

A Month and a Day

2010-03-09T16:10:00.000-08:00

Oliver continues to sleep. Nik and I are grateful, of course, but we certainly can't point to a single thing that might have brought about this dramatic change. After years and years -- Oliver's whole lifetime -- of charting and guessing and trying to draw lines from point A to point B, it seems right and appropriate that this shift should also seem so random. Whatever it is, we'll take it. It

A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Sleep Clinc. ..

2010-02-23T16:08:00.001-08:00

So, um, have I mentioned the bit of trouble Oliver has had with sleep over the years? I have? Have I told you what a complete crisis it feels like when you and your child, and your husband and your other children aren't getting the kind of sleep that you need? If I were a detainee and this was some kind of sleep deprivation tactic I would have confessed long ago. I would have folded completely

Waiting for our wind

2010-02-21T20:22:00.000-08:00

Twelve years ago I was invited to crew on a 42-foot wooden sailboat in the South China Sea. I was living at the time on a small island in the Philippines and already contemplating my return to this side of the world in the year to follow. I was young and free and ready for the next adventure. So even though I had no sailing experience and I didn't know what lay ahead of me, I was ready to step

Are you hungry?

2010-02-16T07:15:00.000-08:00

I'm guest posting today over at (Never) Too Many Cooks. Come and visit! And while you're at it check out some of the other delicious recipes my friends are cooking up! Cheers!

In Snow Time

2010-02-10T20:19:00.000-08:00

One nice thing about this series of snow days we've been having is that it has forced us to S-l-o-w D-o-w-n! I know this is important. But sometimes I forget that it is important. Slowing down, doing less, spending more time paying full attention to what we are doing: it is SO important. For Oliver, I think it is one of the more important things that we do to help him get on in this world

Holy Snow, Batman!

2010-02-08T20:04:00.000-08:00

Can you believe all this snow? I know this doesn't impress those of you from the North -- or the West -- but this is Virginia for pete's sake! Almost made it!! There is a snowman under there somewhere. The best thing about snow? Snow Cream!!!

Searching for Wyken, Blyken and Nod

2010-02-08T19:20:00.000-08:00

Tonight we are Clonidine-free. It took us essentially two weeks to wean Oliver from the medication that we had hoped would help us solve the ever-present sleep problem. The decision to try a sleep medication was a long time coming. Oliver is seven and a half now and has never slept well. To put it nicely. I suppose we always thought -- hoped -- he would grow out of it. But the impact of lost

Portrait of a Snow Day

2010-02-03T19:36:00.000-08:00

When it doesn't even matter if your socks match When getting dressed is half the battle When you can't believe it takes THIS long to get dressed When you need to take a break half way through the layering When you can't believe how magical it all feels

100 mile diet update

2010-02-01T18:33:00.000-08:00

Well, there it is. February 1st and this is the remainder of the foods that we put away over the summer to carry us through these long cold winter months when the farmers market tables look so bare. If we were pioneers we probably wouldn't make it through the winter! Four bags of pesto, pickles, three kinds of salsa, green beans, jam, and some tomatoes. Actually, we still have quite a few more

What you keep is the getting there

2010-01-31T20:33:00.000-08:00

Some time ago I wrote that I had come to realize that in my subconscious mind there was always an after-autism. In this after-autism time we would look back and laugh at how much we worried. No, don't get me wrong. I knew from the start that autism is a way of being. A life-long way of being. There's no curing that. There's no changing that. But somehow in my magical way of thinking, there was to

Why I could be re-painting my kitchen but probably won't.

2010-01-13T08:07:00.000-08:00

When Mom-NOS posted that her New Year's resolution was to post every day in January I thought to myself: Hmmm. What a great idea! I should do that. I need a blogging kick in the butt. But I hedged a bit and decided that I wouldn't say it out loud. That way, I thought, I can change my mind and not have to make excuses. And so I did. Change my mind, I mean. Like on January 2nd. But I at least

Gravity Pulls You In

2010-01-06T08:24:00.000-08:00

I'm a bit of a luddite when it comes to technology. I might just be the only person left on the face of the earth who has never carried a cell phone. I just recently threw out the last of my old cassette tapes and switched over to an MP3 player. I have never even seen an instant message and the chat feature on facebook scares me. But I will admit to you that I do, frequently, turn to the

Broken Things

2009-12-02T07:55:00.000-08:00

The bubble has burst. Three ay em comes so damn early some days, ya know? But, like I said to Nik: At least I could sleep through it. Honey. Seriously, my husband is so incredible. Not only did he let me pretend that I didn't hear the boy but he brought me coffee in bed at seven, having given up any thoughts of going back to sleep himself hours before. But before we get discouraged (easy for me,

Night and Day

2009-12-01T10:22:00.000-08:00

Another gorgeous velvet night of sleep. Another beautiful day that begins after a small hint of light brightens the sky. I could get used to this. The boys took off on a walk to the library with Rachel and I am sitting down to start checking off things from my to-do list. Every now and then I straighten up and peer from my desk out into the street below. A solitary panic grabs me: Where are the

The Remarkable Incident of the Button

2009-11-30T08:17:00.000-08:00

A new set of pajamas is on the top of the Christmas list for Oliver. He is now regularly wearing an old, old pair of PJs that he inherited from Resident Teenager. (It is so hard to believe that Oliver, now seven, is wearing clothes that RT wore ten years ago!) The pjs are a comfy flannel, green and white checks with teddy bears. And the button up the front. Buttoning was never on my list of

May the sleep be with you.

2009-11-30T07:34:00.000-08:00

And also with you. For years these have been the last words uttered between Nik and I as we drift off into a hopeful sleep. Anyone who lives with a child with a sleep disorder knows that it can be rough. The hardest part, I might add, isn't waking in the night but the long days that follow when we must still function. We must be patient and loving, responsible and alert, even when all we want to

Thankful

2009-11-28T19:40:00.000-08:00

This year marked the second year of our new family tradition in which we celebrated with a room full of people who probably have a whole lot less to be thankful for than many. I count myself lucky to part of a community of people who make it their business, on a daily basis, to be helpful to others. In years past, I might have appreciated this kind of community meal because it would have made me

In which it takes six hours to fill a cavity

2009-11-19T15:24:00.000-08:00

I have a good dentist. A really good dentist. After years of seeing not so good dentists I can tell the difference. But even my really good dentist couldn't make the dental experience trouble free with my fair boy. Teeth brushing has always been a challenge for us. When Oliver was very young it was downright traumatic. It was so traumatic that I negotiated with my husband: Look, I'll do all the

Reason 1001 why Rachel Rocks!

2009-11-17T18:09:00.000-08:00

Ok, have I ever told you that Oliver has a teeny tiny little sleeping problem? Well, I mean it doesn't seem to be much of a problem for Oliver. But for the rest of us? It pretty much stinks. Imagine if you will, what it would be like to not sleep through the night for 7 years straight. Alright, I'm exaggerating a little bit. But only a little bit. Anyway, Oliver has been on a no-sleep bender

I Waiver

2009-11-16T18:12:00.000-08:00

I interrupt all of the blog-silence to bring you breaking news from the little green house. A couple of months ago I went to a short presentation on Virginia Medicaid waivers. I wasn't going to attend because I am in the midst of applying for the DD waiver and have been hitting some roadblocks. Oliver doesn't test well. Well, he doesn't really test at all. Almost every time we have him evaluated

Happy Accident - a Giveaway

2009-10-13T07:27:00.000-07:00

I had been waiting until I finished my RDI certification to reward myself with the purchase of a book I had been wanting to read for ages. So imagine my happiness when Sami, bringing in the mail, handed me the fat yellow envelope bearing Vicki Forman's memoir, This Lovely Life. Then, imagine my surprise and happiness when not one but two copies of the book slid into my greedy hands. A quick

Driving under the influence

2009-10-04T19:59:00.000-07:00

I had two bad Sundays in a row. Days when I had to talk myself out of crying. Days when I gripped the steering wheel and forced myself to think of all the good and positive things that we have going for us. On both of these days we went for long bike rides and that helped. I see Oliver holding his body straight as his strong legs pump and the bike sways from side to side beneath him. I watch as

Dear Mr. Springsteen,

2009-09-27T13:18:00.000-07:00

I am a longtime fan of yours. My children have also become fans of yours since your CD, We Shall Overcome, is on regular rotation at our house. Because of you, my son knows all the words to Old Dan Tucker and can sing them too. This means a great deal to me because, you see, my son has autism and has a great difficulty speaking. But he can sing Old Dan Tucker. I am writing to you because it has

My go-cart kid is picking up speed

2009-09-19T19:59:00.000-07:00

Nik took the boys on their bikes to the park one day this week in the sometimes hard to fill time between dinner and bedtime. I stayed home to recharge before the brushing of the teeth, changing of clothes and the long bedtime ritual that comes with a child who has trouble falling asleep. When the boys returned I asked Sami if he had a good time. He said that he did and that he met a new friend

What can be done about the weather?

2009-09-17T20:01:00.000-07:00

If I were brave enough to go back through some of my old posts on this blog, I can imagine that I might be able to track some significant behavior issues and tie them in with the change of the seasons. We've had some rough moments in our little green house over the past few days. I hesitate to use the word rough though because in the scheme of things, the rough of today is just a blip on the

Learning by Doing

2009-09-15T19:18:00.000-07:00

Have I mentioned here that Oliver is a bike riding superstar? Yes? Ok, I know I have. But you can't stop me from saying it. And listen, every single time I get on the bike and ride somewhere with my kids my heart nearly bursts with pride and happiness. I can't help it. It just swells and swells and I have to marvel that there is actually room in my chest for it. I get giddy. I can't stop smiling.

How cool is that?

2009-09-13T19:11:00.000-07:00

My boys have had the great fortune to have a bobcat in our yard for their very own viewing pleasure for most of this past week. Do you have any idea how long children, men and a mom can be totally occupied by watching a bobcat dig a trench? The kids and the men are undoubtedly just delighted by the great pleasure of watching a giant machine move mountains of earth. The mom, well, she mostly

What Happened In Between

2009-09-02T21:14:00.000-07:00